Game ONe

Well someone at the Los Angeles Kings marketing department was working overtime today as the Kings threw together a pretty big home opener celebration. It was enough to even make an unemployed man smile.

Is anyone looking to hire a so-so hockey exec?
Anyone? Ottawa? Islanders?

In addition to purple and silver balloons at the front entrance, the Kings pulled out all the stops. There were some street hockey games going on as well as the natural companion to any sporting event... Pink Floyd and Led Zeppelin tribute bands playing in the street.

Best designated driver vehicle ever.

It was quite packed. LA Live was buzzing as well, all the restaurants and bars were filled with Kings fans, Dodger fans and USC fans. And Mr. L.A. Live himself stood above it all... admiring his rejuvenation of Downtown Los Angeles...

First Downtown LA.... then the world.

But of course the biggest event of the night (besides the actual hockey game being played) was the Purple Carpet arrival of the Los Angeles Kings and Alumni.

Yup, that's a purple carpet.

Foxy in the house!

It's... former Kings backup goalie Gary Edwards.
Yeah, I had no idea who he was either.

Bailey! Get off the Purple Carpet before you piss all over it!!

The whole affair was hosted by 95.5 KLOS DJ Cynthia Fox. It was painfully obvious that she had no idea who any of these people were and would have much rather been introducing Creedence Clearwater Revisited at the LA County Fair.

I hate my life.

Eventually the players starting arriving and then the real magic began... as the players awkwardly rushed past the fans and headed inside the Staples Center.

Jarret Stoll will not answer your questions about Rachel Hunter.

Anze Kopitar mistakenly thought his hands were going to be pressed into cement tonight.

Just because you are a Rookie of the Year finalist...
doesn't mean you know how to tie a tie.

I have no idea what Wayne Simmonds is doing but I love it.

Justin Williams just wanted to get some school work done before the game.

Is it just me... or does Ryan Smyth have a little Patrick Bateman in him?

Jack Johnson was the only player to really stop and chat with Cynthia Fox... and I'm pretty sure this is the way Jack likes it...

All your cameras belong to Jack.

While standing next to the Purple Carpet I had the chance to learn what the shittest job in the world is... waiting to give Kings Alumni Jamie Storr his jersey.

1 truly is the loneliest number.

And then... Jamie Storr arrived.

Of course.

Storr still dressing like he's 33 years old.
Oh wait, he is 33 years old. And retired.

Now that all the stars were in the building, Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy and I decided to head inside and see what was different from last year. There was one big change... our normal eating area had been transformed into a hip club atmosphere.

And there were all sorts of new foods. Mac and Cheese bites, fish tacos, make-your-own-salads!

In a few years, the Victory Knot Pretzel Company will understand that
this may not have been the best economy to launch a 20 dollar pretzel in.

There were reminders all over that something special was about to happen...


And the Kings did put on quite an opening ceremony. There was an amazing video that highlighted some of the great Kings moments from their history. (I really hope the Kings will upload this on their site.) It even impressed Luc Robitaille and his buddy Bruce McNall.

Former Kings owner and felon Bruce McNall on the far left.

Finally, the pomp and circumstance was over and we could settle into our seats and check out what new Kings fans we were going to be sharing this half season with.

I hope this family sits in front of us for every game.
Now those are Kings fans!

And then the stupid fucking Kings lost the stupid fucking game to the stupid fucking bankrupt Phoenix Coyotes. I hate hockey.

Had I known this was going to refer to the goal light behind the Kings net...
I wouldn't have gone to this stupid, fucking game.